My life currently has been like a book. I ended one chapter and am trying to start a new one. It all started with a group of friends of mine and my depression. While my depression got worse so did my friends. They ignored me, pushed me away and left me alone to rot. I felt more alone than I ever have before and during the whole thing I was just angry. The time that I needed friends the most these people that I surrounded myself didn’t want to be there. It would be different if the didn’t understand what I was feeling but they, every single one of them, were struggling with eternal battles and I would do everything in my power to be there. They decided to pass the worry to my family which I wasn’t ready for, I wanted friends. I lost all of them as friends. To end that chapter, I decided that I needed to accept the fact that those people are not meant to be my friends any more and I needed new ones and hold older friends close.
My transition to the next chapter in my life was longingly meant by spring break which gave me time to relax and hang out with old friends I’ve had since high school. I grew in strength and fought my depression harder than before. I spent more time with my family and less time alone in my room. My hair during all of this has been the same for the past couple months, brown which faded to blue. I was invited to a group of new friend’s apartment to hang out and eat. The beginning of my new chapter was dyeing my hair black and hanging out with new friends. It was smiling at the world and holding my head up high. It was being grateful of the genuine and amazing people that I have had in my life for so long and who worked as a stable foundation for me to rise on. I don’t miss my old hair as I don’t miss those old “friends.”